hello blog-loves.
update time.

firstly, and very importantly, my hands are on the mend. give it a few more days and they'll be good as new. this is an immense relief! it got to the point where i just stopped coping, which of course was over easter when medical facilities were shutburgers.

today i am sick with other ails, aah it's so much fun being me! lack of sleep has triggered shivers and aches and nausea and dizziness, i don't think catching up on sleep will salvage me anymore.

yesterday i spend 8 hours at the polytech learning about the sale of liquor act, in a bid to apply for my duty manager certificate. it was painful. not so much because it was dull (it had it's moments) but more because i find it so damn upsetting that we have this utterly abhorrent drinking culture in our country. it really bugs me. according to one economist's study, in 2004 kiwi taxpayers spend a whopping $11 billion on alcohol related issues. this is not ok! what is wrong with 'us' that we feel the need to get shitfaced to the extent that we cause more damage than you can even really imagine? i mean, $11 billion!!! i have to stop writing about it, i'm getting knotted up again.

in other news, helen and marco are mere days from leaving. currently they're holidaying in golden bay, so i am housemateless. i hate that they are leaving! i miss helen already, and she's only been gone a day. for sisters who used to swap bites for kicks, we now get on very well and i happily consider her my friend as well as little sis. it'll be hard being without her again. thank the gods for such wondrous technologies as skype.

my friend matt may move in, which would be an easy way to solve my housemate issues. for although i like the idea of a few weeks on my own, more than that will just get difficult in the money department. and i have a raft of money-sucking thing to attend to, such as renewing my passport and planning a trip to sydney for late winter. man, i hope that can happen! definitely been too long since i was there. i can't think of a better way to spend a few days than wandering newtown with the esteemable jeffmeister (love you). my friend nik lives there now as well, which means another very good reason to visit old sydney town.

i had the lovely j&m to stay last week, lucky me! they made super first houseguests, and justin and i had plenty of opportunities to talk art and craft and bounce ideas off each other. we also managed to fit in a lengthy breakfast and cribbage session at the addington coffee co-op, a la last winter. definitely a sweet weekend.

now, back to my sage-oliveleaf-ginger-lemon-honey tea and perhaps a page or two of shantaram (i'm over halfway through now).

love to you blogfolk
xxx

my hands are wrecked.
there is nothing, NOTHING, ok about this. it is the most demoralising depressing thing. i can't do the simplest things, and it is driving me fucking crazy.
FUUUUUUUCK.
rant over.

ONLY LOVE CAN BREAK YOUR HEART

so said neil young


i am not heartbroken, but i am heartsore.
i made a decision today which feels like the right one, even if it's a bit shit. and sad. but you know, i'm all about the simplicity and happiness and i think i'm on the right road. i feel like making this decision is a step in the right direction, a step towards being the best person i can be. god that sounds awful, but that is cynical me talking, and didn't i say something about casting cynical eroica aside for a while?
this is all good learning. many a challenge, as if i could expect otherwise. life is a bitch! but a beautiful sweet bitch.
someone tell me to shut up?

x e

A NEW WEEK

last week was shit, for various reasons that i don't intend to divulge.
this week shall be a much better one! i am determined to make it so. it's off to a good start... a sunny morning, i don't have to be at work till lunch time, and i have tentative dinner plans with the darling gregstar this evening.
right, blogfolk, i'm off to read shanataram for a bit.
xx love

The Wiggles ~ You Make Me Feel Like Dancing

i don't care what you say, there is nothing wrong with this video!
in fact, on a shitty day, it's about the only thing to bring a smile
hehe.

blogpeeps, it's going very well.
<3

.. and then when we parted company, he kissed me. just a peck, but it was on the lips. so, for someone so shy, i think i can take that as a sign he really is interested in more than the sweet friendship we already have going.

i have no appetite and mild insomnia.
this can mean only one thing, blogpeeps.
yes, i am crushing.

*freaking out freaking out freaking out*

it's been a while.
x

summer delights

late night adventures leave me over tired but smiling.
it was the most eerie night in new brighton. thick thick mist, and so very still. i've never before walked down the pier without getting windswept! standing at the end, staring out at a wall of solid air was very disconcerting. such a fitting end to a beautiful day.



and haiku for greg:

summer happiness!
the sun is setting pinkly
in woolston tonight

x

sunny saturday, no work for me
lyttelton for coffee and market
then home for lunch with sis
and my new nephew
shit, he's cute.