hello blog

in about 8.5 hours i have to get up and get myself to the airport so i can fly away.

what the fuckkkkk!

i am a nervous wretch right now, i don't know what's going to help me manage this. and i need to see ariel. and i don't want to LEAVE, damn it. i don't WANT to.

my hands are all shaky and i have a lump in my throat and my bags are packed and it's all just too too much.

favour to ask: can you leave a comment or send me an email? i could really do with the contact.\

thank you, blog friends.

x

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UPDATiNG

i'm just going to rip off the email i send victoriaimhleas.

"i've been packin' like a mad thing all day... the end is in sight methinks... yay!
yeah, it's hard work alright, especially the memory stuff. who knew that paper could be so exhausting!
i have a lovely friend arriving for dinner and distraction in an hour, looking forward to that. i may even open a bottle of wine! (quite a rare occurence for this frog)
i am excited in a not-sure-it's-really-happening sort of way... i'm sure it'll hit home soon enough though! my little sis arrived in melbourne yesterday, i got a real big wave of excitement/emotionalstuff when she texted me this morning telling me she was on a mission to find coffee. our deal is that i will buy her all the coffee she can drink in our one week overlap before she gets on her flight back to europe.
so yeah, looking forward with a sparkle in my eye... and trying not to feel too sad about what and who i'm leaving here in nz."

oh, and i had a cool thing happen today. someone i quietly admire told me that she wanted to be my friend (shit timing eh). made me smile, i had no idea she had registered me on her social radar at all. so yeah, cool bananas to that.

can i stop now, please?
this packing and organising and tidying is doing my head in.
oh please pleeease let it end!
will it end?
will it EVER end?
*whimper*

i need coffee and the company of people rather than of stuff stuff and stuffff.
help
.

it's not as bad as it could be.
the piles of stuff are diminishing.
and i got to give a whole lot of great stuff to my sister, which she was really pleased about as she's just moved into a place of her own with very little. win win!
it's all the bitsy pieces of paper and notes and scraps of arty stuff which are proving to be quite a challenge. there is no way of categorising them, no way of neatly organising them... so i think i'll just scoop them into a suitcase and let them sort themselves out.

6 days and counting!
143 boxes and counting!
4325 deep breaths and counting!

i went back to work today, it was strange to go there and realise that i really have left, and i really don't miss most of it! the staff, yes. the job? nah.
i'm enjoying being unemployed for a bit, though of course i am way too busy to really enjoy it. busy avoiding packing. ;-)
i'm sort of thinking about maybe just getting temp or casual work when i get to melbourne, which will leave me with a bit of freedom to go up to sydney for a few days to see the fishmeister and a few other friends from days of yore. maybe broken hill too, if i can persuade a certain cowgirl to drive me out into the desert.
plenty of time for settling down, i reckon.

x

i'm counting down the days, blogpeeps.
must be about 8.
(hey, i never said i was counting them well!)
then it's me and melbourne and a whole new exciting adventure.
it feels truly strange to be unemployed. strange and good.
i'd love to be unemployed for a couple of months, but i shall be needing to find work pretty sharpish when i land in melby.
oh, now here's something to make you laugh. true story. the last thing i ever said to a customer in my career at piko was "i don't want to hear it, just get the hell out of here."
and then i locked the door, did a jig, and bid a fond farewell to the place. it's felt more home than home for a long time.
it seemed that i was coping with leaving a lot better than some of my workmates. poor wee minkeys, what'll they do without me to get rid of those late-to-leave fuckers?
yeh.
so.
then i went to WOMAD which was so freakingly fabulous that i'm not even going to attempt to describe it just yet. suffice to say that mariza blew my mind.
and now i'm back, after much driving and only one speeding ticket. back to a whole lot of stuff that needs organising! today i managed to sell my car and sort out a few things, but it's the packing-stuff-into-boxes-and-getting-rid-of-stuff-i-don't-want that is going to kill me if i'm not careful.
wish me luck and fortitude and all things sugary.
x

tomorrow is my last day at work.
Piko has been home for over three years now, it's a big thing for me to be leaving.
i'e made so many brilliant friends at work, and learned so so much about a hundred and one different things.
i hope these skills are going to set me in good stead for finding a kickass job when i get to melbourne.
whenever that is.
this waiting game is one i don't wish to play.
i want to know that tig is going to be happy and healthy, and i want to know that i'm going to be happy too.
womadness will take my mind off things for a few days at least. i'm very much looking forward to soaking up some sounds and sunshine (fingers crossed) and hopefully even getting time to sit down and read!
x

jump to it, she says.
i do.

year of the pig
Originally uploaded by frogstarstrikesagain.

this evening i enjoyed my 3rd chinese new year festival in victoria square. same lanterns every year, same food stalls (same coriander pancakes.. mmm), same bad karaoke, same weird singing and dancing, i love it.

one of my closest and dearest friends had her tonsils out last wednesday.
and yesterday she was told there was cancer in them.
what now?
hoping like hell that it hasn't spread.
scans and results and options.

i can't say i'm feeling good about having a flight booked out of here in 3 weeks.

x

wonderwoman
Originally uploaded by frogstarstrikesagain.

erm...

by the way, blogpeeps, this photo is of me and all my siblings. a moment to be remembered, 6 kids and dad all together for the first time in about 14 years.

"The problem with having a weak bladdar is that everyone takes the piss out of you."

she wasn't trying to be funny.